He's Just Not That Into You

I've never known an animal so instinctual, so prey-driven, so relentless, and greedy. I've never known a creature who would sacrifice religion, kingship, nations, and family just to satisfy lust. I've never seen such a monstrous oddity...as man.

For 23 years, I've watched the cycles. I've watched men come and go and come again. I've watched them weasel their way in to the hearts of unsuspecting women, claiming to want to love and honor and protect. But, in the end, the entire mission is just a conquest.

And even though its 2010 and women are hunters too, I still see an unfair ratio. I still hear conversations among friends who've been hurt or disappointed. I still experience my own distaste for the male species because when given the chance to do right...they often don't.

But this isn't the male bashing blog. And I am not another angry scarred woman. I'm just "Miss Reality Check" and I think that heartbreak is preventable. That's right, I said it! Heartbreak is preventable and often self-afflicted. Because the signs are there people. And when denial moves out of the way, the truth is waiting like a glorified sunrise...unavoidable and magnificent.



You want to know more about the signs? I thought you'd never ask. Let's start from the top.



1) Phone calls. If you've been waiting for him to call since 1998, its time to let go. No, your phone didn't just fail to record a missed call and No...he doesn't have the wrong number saved. No! He didn't get hit by a short bus on the way home from work. He's just...not that into you.

2) Text Messages. If you text him...daily...and he either doesn't text back or texts one word answers every once in a while. He's gently saying that there just isn't much to say. And even though guys can be nonchalant and laid back, when they want something...really want something...they go full throttle. If you can't get him to respond to a text, you probably won't be able to get him to do much else.

3) Dates. I just need to take a moment and define "date". A date is not just an event that two people attend together. It isn't a date just because he paid. He might've just been raised by parents instead of bears or baboons. He might just be a nice guy. It's not a date until he makes it clear that he wants it to be a date. Reaching for your hand and asking when you'd like to go out again are good signals but him talking past you while gawking at another girl's butt...not so much.

4) Sex. If, after a night of romance, he sees you downtown with your friends and fails to acknowledge your existence...please don't assume that he didn't see you. He definitely saw you. You were damn-near river dancing to get his attention, but he avoided you anyway. The simple truth? Sex doesn't bond souls...it bonds anatomy. Nothing less, nothing more.

To be continued...

That's all I've got for now people. It's really not that deep. Either he's into you or he isn't. Save your tears for real tragedies. This whole relationship thing is overrated. A woman's intuition is so powerful. I believe that every woman knows when she is being authentically loved. There is a constant presence of security, compassion, and sincerity.

When you constantly have to vouch for your love or validate your man by talking about all the "nice things" he's done in the past (keyword: past) it's time to let go and let life heal you. I know that men can be absolute dogs. But if women wouldn't be so quick to let the dog catch the pussycat...there'd be a lot less broken hearts in the love doctor's office.

I'm just bein real.