Women Don't Like Each Other.

If we could see past our differences, our pride, our egos, and our agendas...we'd be able to admire the beauty that bonds us.


We're women. We're pre-wired to care more about others than ourselves. We rise before the sun to guarantee that our days will be flawless and our faces will be properly painted on. We're perfect yet broken yet beautiful yet burdened.

There are so many similarities but still we stand divided. Friendships are fractured because of misunderstandings and assumptions. Our love is merely glue that dries and weakens over time. We are so easily distracted. We forget each other. We fail to forgive each other. I'm worried. We are the thread that holds the hem of humanity. Without us...nations fall. But where is the love?

Where is the companionship that will help us live through the painful seasons? Where are the smiles that serve as sunshine on the darkest days?

I want you to know that I love you. I don't always understand you and I won't always agree with you. But I'll be here to encourage and inspire you. No matter what. When you're crying at night...convinced that no one is thinking of you...I am. When you feel ugly and unwanted...trust that I see your glow even when the lamp shade of life tries to hide it momentarily.

I'm spreading love today because I'm convinced that love will drown out all of the hate among us. Please send this message to a few women today. CC me. I need to know that there are others who still believe in love and sisterhood. I adore you. Be encouraged. Be brave enough to love.

I'm tired of being average.

I’m a runner.

But I am not an athlete. I am not a track star.

I only run from opportunities, love, obligations, responsibility, relationships, and reality. I always have. And until now…I found a sick form of contentment in knowing that I would always flee from the things and people that intimidate me. But as life passes and seasons replicate…I realize that all I’ve accumulated is a long list of regrets and an army of enemies that despise my inability to commit to anything but life itself.

I hate commitment. It hated hated me first. Everything I loved, as a child, walked away from me or vanished while I was sleeping. My world was shattered and tarnished by inconsistency, change of address forms, new schools, lost friends, and loneliness. Nothing ever lasted long enough to feel permanent or tangible. So I eventually formed an addiction to change.

Now…years later…I seek rehabilitation. I am tired of running. I am tired of quitting.

I want to have the same address for more than six months. I want to wake up next to the same face for the next 80 years. I want to celebrate my 90th birthday with the friends I graduated from high school with…I want to hold on long enough to find out what’s on the other side of forever. I want to know what it feels like to look back and find joy in the memories. I want to let someone love me…

I'm  too tired to spend my life jumping hurtles to avoid falling in love or sprinting to avoid pain or disappointment.

I am tired of being average. I am ready to be awesome.

Joy is Free.

There are so many things in this life that we lust after and yearn for...many of us have wish lists, bucket lists and shopping lists. Lately, I've started to give thanks for the things in life that cannot be attained with money. I am grateful for a wealth that is spiritual. I am blessed to have gifts that cannot be purchased...like the ability to encourage and inspire others.


Today, I encourage you to enjoy the things in your life that cannot be found on store shelves or in boutiques. Treasure the joy you have...the breath in your body...the laugh that resounds from the pit of your belly. Enjoy the blessings that no one gave you and no one can take away.



With all my love,



NNL

If it looks like love...

We live in a society and in an age when everything is questionable. Most of us are full of doubt because of past disappointments and wounds that haven't healed properly. We shrug off opportunities to discover and develop new relationships. We avoid challenges and, consequentially, fail to add color and adventure to our lives.


I suggest you try something new every day. Most of us are terrified of change. Fear is preventing so many of us from living up to our potential. Doubt keeps us in on Saturday nights. Our closets are filled with shoes we don't wear because we are convinced that trying to get off the couch and find that special person is "pointless" in 2012.

This weekend, put on your prettiest dress or sharpest slacks and get out! You just might connect with someone. And if it looks like love...it just might be. You won't know until you open your mind and your heart. Be encouraged. Be brave. Carpe diem :)

Forever.

Forever (noun): a false notion of permanence; a word often used to make guarantees that aren't realistic; a rope that lynches free spirits; a cage that cripples those who were purposed to fly. ..

I don't believe forever is a term that should be used so loosely and casually among those who have never been able to commit to anything or anyone for longer than 6 months. When I wake up each morning, I give thanks and I try to make an impressive plan-of-action for the day. I usually don't know what I intend to do with my time outside of what's mandatory (eat, sleep, work-then repeat). I 'd love to say that I'm just spontaneous and that each day is a beautiful surprise.

But the reality is...I don't like commitments. I don't like making promises that I am 90% sure I won't keep. I don't make promises and I don't believe people who make promises to me. I've been disappointed so many times that I stopped looking forward. I'm frozen in a place where the pain is minimal because the numbness surmounts all recollection of each time someone promised me forever.

In my lifetime, forever has never lasted longer than three years.

Relationships end.
Leases end.
People die.

So...why are we so afraid of what's temporary? In this society, everything is merely a trending topic that won't be relevant in an hour. We're all looking for what's better or brighter or bigger or more beautiful. Yet, we constantly look lovers and mothers and employers in the eye and use the term forever like a leash that will help us control situations that we couldn't handle otherwise.

I don't even know what I'm going to eat for dinner tonight. So why am I expected to know, at 25, who I want to spend the rest of my life with? It's overwhelming and unrealistic for me. I wish people would stop asking me what I want to do when I grow up and where I want to be in 10 years. The only thing I know about 2022 is that I want to still be alive. Is that not enough? 

Sometimes, I think I know exactly what the future holds. But I'm always wrong.

I'd rather be an actress on the stage of life than a producer. I give my power away. I'm tired of trying to make everything last forever, It's ridiculous. I have to concentrate on the gorgeous moment that exists right now. Tomorrow can take care of itself. God can take care of everyone else.

I'm only committed to designing and living a gorgeous life. My only promise to live it...courageously.


NNL

Courage.

I used to collect masks. I loved them all. I wore them all.

Every unique disguise was intended to help me blend in...or stand out. I was capable of hiding every emotion that I believed to be annoying. I could serve as the socialite in any room. My smile was painted on and my tears were optional...only visible if I wore a mask of vulnerability. Even my flaws were a cover-up.

I thought I needed masks. I thought my raw identity was too troublesome and too complicated. I felt unlovable and unacceptable.

Life has a funny way of removing those carnal things and habits that we believe we need in order to survive...

More specifically, God has a funny way of reminding me that all I need is Him.

I don't wear masks anymore. Not because I don't want to...but because disguises have the ability to effect the psyche. I started to forget who I was and who I really wanted to be. I started to lie to me. I was in too deep. I played a role 24 hours a day and eventually...I didn't even know who I was looking at when standing in front of the mirror.

I've spent years trying to decide who I am and what I need. I struggle to be authentic and transparent. I am desperate to accept myself so that I can encourage others to accept me too.

It takes so much courage to just be you <3


NNL

Everybody Won't Like You.

You have two choices.

1) Focus on those who don't approve of your lifestyle, your relationship, your career path, or your appearance. Or...

2) Place your emphasis on those who know how to celebrate you just as you are! I've learned how to zoom in on the people in my life who affirm and inspire me.

I am currently surrounded by supporters who are excited about my future and couldn't care less about my past. I never feel like I have to hide my true desires or identity from the people who really know me. I've designed a special community intended to remind me that being quirky, rebellious, spoiled, and outrageously ambitious is fine. I have friends who remind me to slow down and enjoy each day.

I also have friends who motivate me and tell me when I'm failing to live up to my potential. I'm blessed to have such a versatile and colorful life filled with people who are committed to laughing with me during the good times and crying with me when nothing seems to be going right. I challenge you to evaluate your own social Rolodex. Spring cleaning is a must! Make sure that everyone in your life has an awesome and unique purpose. Be selective. You deserve to have a life filled with love and support.

Remember, if people aren't adding something...they're subtracting from your energy and happiness. I love you. Be encouraged.


NNL

Joy. (New Beginnings)

Joy.


I used to think that, in order to be happy; I needed an audience of co-signers. I thought I needed people in my life who were willing to validate the decisions I made. It has taken 25+ years to accept that the only voice I need to hear is my own. When I replay the hateful comments and negative opinions that others shared with me, my own thoughts get muffled.

I want to celebrate this gorgeous day by encouraging you to hear your own voice.

If you aren’t surrounded by people who know how to affirm and inspire you, don’t fret. Sometimes God puts me in environments where I have to be my own best friend, my own cheerleader, my own counselor, and my own example. Years ago, I learned to love myself because I had no other choice. I learned to trust my own voice because I had no one else to confide in or trust.

Opt not to feel lonely when people around you don’t understand your plans, dreams or desires. Instead, take advantage of the quiet moments. They come to provide you with time for peace and reflection.

There have been dozens of occasions when I was surrounded by twenty or more “friends” and I felt completely alone. I felt like I had to hide behind an image that others had grown to love and admire. I lost myself while searching for acceptance. I can happily say that I am a new, healthy woman…because I endured the silence, the dark nights, and the “loneliness”.

I found sunlight and hope on the other side of self-doubt and fear. I hope that you’ll start to worry less and really live more. Leave people and their opinions behind you. Figure out what you want and deserve. Abandon your insecurities and adopt joy.



I love you. Be encouraged.