1) He won’t show up like a thief in the night, rob you of your love then disappear before the sun comes up
2) He won’t whisper sweet nothings in your ear because nothings don’t amount to anything. Everything he says will be something of substance
3) He won’t call you another woman’s name “by accident”
4) He won’t tell you that he is interested, then “forget” to text/call you for a few days
5) He won’t remind you that he can have anyone he wants…every single day
6) He won’t hit you…ever.
7) He won’t have Daddy’s Home by: Usher as a ring tone for his “home girl”
8) He won’t have a wife…and 2 kids…and a dog named Spike
9) He won’t invite you over at 11pm, then ask you to leave at 12:30am because he’s gotten what he wanted from you and doesn’t like sleepovers
10) He won’t make you question yourself, your body, and your intelligence by failing to reassure and encourage you
11) He won’t let you forget how beautiful you are
12) He won’t hurt you, intentionally…
13) He won’t make you abandon your friends and loved ones
14) He won’t live off of you and watch you work to feed him and the children you may have together, while he sits on the couch from 9-5 like a failure
15) He won’t constantly complain about life and everything he hasn’t accomplished and subsequently, bring you down into depression with him
16) He won’t think that seeing you cry is funny
17) He won’t lie to you like you’re a 9-year old naïve little girl, then get angry when you question him or attempt to speak up when you’re in pain
18) He won’t allow your insecurities to intensify because of neglect, nonchalance, and laziness
19) He won’t ask you to be his mistress while he “works on” leaving his wife/girlfriend
20) He won’t be typical. He won’t disgust you.
6 comments:
Love this! #2 and #7 are my favs!
and reading this makes me wonder... are there ANY real men out there??
Generally, I can't stand women sitting around talking about what a man is or isn't, especially when neither of them has a penis but you highlight some very good points in this list. I have, on numerous occasions, curled up in a quiet corner to lament at the meandering, mindless ways of men and wondered why, WHY, do they do/say some of the things they do/say. But, I hesitate to use the term "real man." I think a man is a man, period. Depending on their background and the level of home training they receive, they are all capable of greatness or failure, sometimes simultaneously. We have to read the tea leaves and follow our hearts to what we hope will be a true, lasting and fulfilling relationship and this will not be devoid of errors and slips ups along the way. We have to know ourselves and set boundaries accordingly. There's not a magic list of rules or requirements, only personal ones. I accidentally called my fiance Eric the other day and I don't even KNOW anyone named Eric. And his name is Tim. Not even close! LOL! Other than some harmless teasing, we didn't miss a beat. I'm just saying.
Aeona,
I think that your comment is, safely,more significant than the post itself. I think its so important to remember that with every "rule" comes the exception. I believe that "real men" are those who choose to embrace manhood and treat others with respect and consideration.
I love your feedback, because in spite of the ups-and-downs lovers go through...love is worth fighting for and waiting for :)
Wow, thanks! Love your blog by the way. Your writing is impeccable!
Aeona-Thanks for your compliments. I'm going to try to keep delivering a little truth whenever I can :)
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